FOOL'S CHRISTMAS

This kind of Midnight Mass is not what I need:
Two bearded dwarfs in leather tear up the floor.
The sharp tongue of a dark god makes my ear bleed.
All Madonna's virgins are decked out like whores.

How this thick smoke burns my eyes! Whatever
happened to snow? This intense heat is a river
of flames I try to dance on forever:
I stumble and fall down hard. Some unknown lover

hauls me up before I drown in the fire.
The half-remembered poem I recite reminds
me of school: Lear's Fool could not be a liar
and disappears forever, while more unkind

players tell pretty lies and survive the play.
This bar is a stage; this stage isn't holy:
They make me get out. I haven't a cent to pay
for the long ride home, alone in Hell's folly.

Poem © 2012 by Dylan Mitchell

LITTLE GIRL BLUE

So large on the stage
Her voice like thunder and rain
Little girl blue so alone

Haiku © 2012 by Dylan Mitchell

THE MAN WHO QUIT MONEY

Mark Sundeen's THE MAN WHO QUIT MONEY gets my vote for Best Nonfiction Book of 2012. I actually read this amazing paperback twice. That's how good it is. In fact, it nearly broke my heart to have to return the book to the library. But I did the right thing. Forty people were on the hold list. That should tell you something.

It has been twelve years since Daniel Suelo gave away his life savings, and decided to live without money. Suelo (Spanish for soil) does not live on welfare or receive food stamps. You won't find him on a busy street corner asking for spare change. He forages wild foods and knows which dumpsters are best for a healthy meal or two. He gets around on a humble bike, and walks more miles in a week than most folks walk in a year. And he is sheepish about sleeping at homeless shelters. In fact, Suelo's home is a small cave in Utah. And he's not insane.

If you are wondering why a sane man would choose to live without money, then I strongly suggest you read this compelling book. You might learn a little something about yourself, and it will be a good little something. Why do we live as we do? Is it really healthy to have to hold down a job we dislike, just so we can pay car insurance, rent an expensive roof over our heads, and buy things which are bad for the planet? What would happen if we suddenly threw away the credit cards, learned to grow our own food, and made the choice to never own a car?

Suelo already knows what will happen. And his life is better because of what he has learned. THE MAN WHO QUIT MONEY is one hell of a book. And Suelo is like a modern prophet returning from the desert to remind us that happiness is not found in expensive things, but by connecting with other people. And this doesn't cost us a cent.


Nonfiction
Riverhead Books, 2012

Reader Rating:
10/10

Review © 2012 by Dylan Mitchell

THE BEWILDERING SECOND COMING OF CHRIST

If Christ came back today
what would He see? People
talking on cell phones

instead of to each other?
As they mindlessly
sidestep the homeless on the

downtown sidewalks: American
Idol is about to begin! Security
guards would kick Him out of

stores for looking too down
and out. And after He started
talking about helping

instead of judging the poor
He'd be carted off to the
nearest psych ward,

and given massive amounts
of shock treatments and drugs
for the psychotic ones.

He'd be considered no different
from those that insanely think
they are Beethoven or Hitler

or Marilyn Monroe. Christ might
return only to be tossed in
jail or the state asylum.

Who will save the Savior?


Poem © 2009 by Dylan Mitchell

WHY DO SO MANY MEN HATE CATS?

I really do need somebody to help me out here. Can
someone please tell me why so many men HATE cats?
I mean, I've always liked cats a lot. And I'm pretty
sure I'm a dude. So there are some exceptions. But
keep in mind that I am also a poet - and we tend to be
a fairly strange breed. So maybe that's why I like
cats? But have you ever noticed that most men seem to
DESPISE felines with a vehement passion? It almost
borders on a phobia! These dudes will say the most
incredibly offensive things about cats and their
"sickening" habits. But how come? HELP!

I have a theory? It's just a small one, and not all
that scientific, so again - feel free to offer your own
insights. I think a lot of men secretly feel
threatened by cats. Of course no dude will ever fess
up to that. It would make them appear too weak. And
that's the worst thing that can happen to a dude's
ego. But why the murderous feelings? The only good cat
is a dead cat? That kind of passion to me means that
something very deep is going on inside the dude's
head. I mean, some of the things they will actually
say: Cats are stupid. A dog is better. At least it
will do something when you tell it to. So is that it?
Most men feel threatened by cats because a cat
actually knows how to think for itself, and will look
at you like you are insane if you order it to do
something?

And a lot of men take it very personally when a cat
ignores their attempts at making friends with them.
The cat is simply too stupid or stubborn to be
overjoyed about getting a nice little pat on the head.
Bad, bad cat! Well, I actually admire the cat for
being so independent and aloof. I understand that I am
going to have to earn the cat's respect and trust
before it will allow me to manhandle it in any kind of
fashion. I actually think dogs are kind of silly for
being so easy. It doesn't impress me when I have to
fend off some overgrown mutt that insists I pet it,
and let it lick me from head to toe—not even one
minute after I have first made its acquaintance.

And don't get me started on the litter box deal.
That's usually the excuse I get when I ask a dude why
he is so phobic about cats. He actually hates the
sickening litter box more than the poor cat. But is it
less sickening to have to follow a dog around as you
take it for its morning stroll, and get ready to scoop
up the latest……. I think you know what comes next.
I mean, I find that much more "sickening" than a
harmless little litter box. And who wants to get up at
the crack of dawn, and take Butch outside for his
first walk of the day? I sometimes don't even get out
of bed till the sun has gone down! I am truly baffled
by this cat phobia thing.

So I am hoping that some of you cat hating dudes (the
more honest ones) will bravely step forward and clue
me in. Just fess up that you really hate cats. Then
try and give me a really good reason why - I mean,
something that makes sense. This could very well be
the first step in your recovery - or even my own.
Perhaps you'll somehow convince me that dogs really
are much better than cats. And I hope to hear from
some of the cat lovers too. Men and women both.
Because I am hoping to solve this mystery that's been
bugging me for many a year: Why do so many men hate
cats? Please help me out here.

Essay © 2009 by Dylan Mitchell