Cockroach, cockroach
dashing across my
kitchen floor:
You were shameless
and ugly, but you
are no more.
Where did you come
from? Did I carry
you home from the
store? Or how about that
messy neighbor with
his beer cans and
garbage galore? Did you stagger
to my place, after he booted
you out the door? Now I'll
never learn the truth
because I came up with the
perfect cure: A little bit of
Lysol spray - made you
gasp your last, I'm sure.
You're not as daring and
quick on your feet as
you used to be before.
Just a disgusting creature
on its back, never to nibble
on my crackers anymore:
or shamelessly sip from my
unguarded cup. Show a
little respect for the poor!
Good riddance to your
filthy habits and hunger:
You will not disturb
me anymore. With
one swift flush
I bid you farewell:
Is that not what a toilet is for?
Copyright © 2009 by Dylan Mitchell
A delightfully humorous poem, Dylan. I hate cockroaches, but this witty ode to the dreaded pest has given me some much-needed smiles.
ReplyDeleteJon, your blog is an absolute delight, so I'm glad my poem gave you a smile or two :-)
DeleteI have never, ever, had a cockroach until we moved to Florida where they are the size of your thumb, and FLY. Yes. Yes. And I can scream like a banshee.
ReplyDeleteWith our non-stop rain, they've been coming inside. One landed on my chest last night (from where? I have no idea) and I screamed and flailed my arms and almost gave myself a mastectomy.
Dana, I never saw a cockroach until I moved to West Texas. They seem to thrive in the dry heat. And they were horrifyingly HUGE.
DeleteDana, your comment made me think of the famous short story by Kafka. There's just something very creepy about roaches (big or small) while I think mice are cute. In fact, if a mouse ever decides to visit me, I just might keep it for good.
DeleteI very poor sister had a house mouse that felt comfortable enough with her that he would sit on the arm of the couch at night while she fed the baby. The night her husband killed it, she cried like her heart was broken. This same sister went on to become a multi-millionaire who still remembers that mouse.
DeleteThis would make a great short story or a chapter in a book about how the so called little things in life often are the most important to us.
DeleteMy poor sister had no choice but to set traps for the hundreds of mice that infested the small apartment she lived in.
Once, just for the hell of it, I counted how many times we had to jump up and reset one of the traps while we spent an hour playing cards in her kitchen: Ten mice died in an hour. Yikes!
P.S. I meant a short story about your sister and her much loved mouse. I already wrote a poem about my sister and her Nightmare on Mouse Street.
DeleteThey'll be here after Trump is long gone.
ReplyDeleteSome say cockroaches shall inherit the earth :-)
DeleteHey Dylan,
ReplyDeleteThe only time I have ever seen cockroaches up close and personal was in Cuba. No one cared. They ate off the outdoor buffet tables along with swarms of black flies ... ick.
I hope you don't get anymore Irwin's to contend with. Funny poem :)
Hi it's Dylan, sorry my computer has crashed. I'll be back on line as soon as I can get it fixed.
DeleteThank you for all the support and comments.
Thanks Whisper. I really do miss you, Dana and Jon big time :-)
DeleteGood, creative and funny.
ReplyDeleteI thank you much for the kind words. My interests tend to be rather morbid and dark (see my most recent post), but I thought it would be a nice twist to write something humorous for a change.
ReplyDelete